A Shitty Valentines Day

Even though I received a heart shape box of candy and a beautiful care. this is still a bad day for me. I have my son’s funeral anniversary today.  He was laid to rest on Valentines Day three years ago.  It is a date I can’t forget. The day I said goodbye to my son. As I have stated before, he hung himself.  Suicide. A horrible thing.  I have tried to kill myself so many times I lost count.  I thought everyone would be better off without me and no body would miss me that bad.  I never thought it would mess with so many people.  My son’s death effected so many people.  He had a best friend that I never knew about. So many people came just to see him in a casket.  I have one person tell me that a lot of them didn’t even like him. They just came to see and be seen. It makes me sick to my stomach. When I first saw my son laying in that casket, I was horrified to see his eyes. The dark on the eyelids upper and lower and they appear sunken in.  The plastic shield they put over this chest and stomach was hard when I laid my hand upon it.  My son was ice cold. I collapsed when I first saw him. My husband, sister and Mother had to pull me up from my knees. I found out later that I was still holding on to the coffin when I went to my knees.  I see this scene all the time, but especially today.

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About 1wanderingtruthseeker

I'm a fiftish woman that has opinions and passions about nearly everything under the sun. I love a good debate, not name calling. I believe in the Constitution , the Bill of Rights and God. I believe the government which governs the least is the best government of all. I believe in the rights of the people. I dispatched fire trucks, the Po-Po and ambulances for a long time so I have a wicked sense of dark humor and speak fluent sarcasm. I think out loud a lot times. I am offensive. But I'm offensive of everybody. Socially unacceptable, plain spoken and unashamed. If you don't want to be offend, please don't read and if you do, please consider that I'm not politically correct in any sense of the word.
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